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The first few days and weeks – perhaps even months – after bringing your newborn home can be daunting, especially for new parents. Between adjusting to your new roles and trying to not completely ignore the other aspects of your life, you can easily become exhausted and sleep-deprived every second of the day. If you don’t properly plan on how to go about sharing the responsibilities with your spouse, things can only go downhill from there.
Here are ways on how to divide the duties with your partner to ensure both of you are equally bearing the responsibilities and getting enough rest.
Communicate With Your Spouse
This should go without saying, but a lot of hurdles in a marriage occur due to lack of communication so we’re going to say it anyway. Be honest with your spouse about the responsibilities you take and what you expect of one another in caring for your new baby. Make a list of all duties and weigh the pros and cons of each of you holding down the other duties. This is a very important discussion. You should also be honest about your own feelings as a new parent and how you feel about your spouse’s involvement in it.
It is much easier to handle the stress and responsibilities when you know your partner will be there for you and can alleviate some of the worries and help you find the energy you need to care for your newborn. You should even communicate the amount of rest you each need. If you and your partner aren’t communicating about how much sleep you need, it’s only going to get worse. You’re probably not going to get the sleep you need at night unless you agree on a set time for your partner to take over the duty.
Place Your Newborn in Their Crib or in the Next Room
It’s understandable that parents would want to keep their baby close or use a baby monitor that can signal you when they’re crying. However, it is also important to give them enough space to learn how to comfort themselves when they need to, even when they’re little. Sometimes, they have to cry to release stress and anxiety, so take some time to let them express their feelings before immediately attending to them.
Once you’ve learnt their habits and can distinguish the cues, your body can adjust to waking up at the right time better. At this point, you can safely turn off the baby monitor and you’ll get better, uninterrupted sleep too. Not to mention, placing them in the next room will ensure that you or your spouse can get to continue sleeping well while the other is handling the nighttime duty. Of course, you’d have to share the nighttime duties as well. Here’s one thing you can do:
Share a Similar Bedtime Routine
This one is especially important if you are trying to develop a sleep association for your little one. If you have been doing baby massage after bath time to make them feel sleepy and it has been working so far, they might not be able to fall asleep as easily when your spouse does not do the same routine. Hence, make sure to sit down with your spouse and learn what is the best routine you both can do.
A common bedtime routine is to feed your baby earlier, bathe them, and if you want to, you can add any other additional activities like massaging them, reading a book for them, or playing some music or white noise.
Get an Extra Helping Hand in the House
If you are lucky, you live in a house with parents or parents-in-law that can help you out. In some situations, there may be siblings or other relatives who can be of help too. If these are available options for you too, this can be a great way to take the weight off your shoulders and at the same time let your little one see the many faces of loved ones who are there for them. You can let them get used to being around more people than just their mom and dad. Have your kid engage in bonding experiences where they can watch you, your spouse, and others interact with their little ones.
If you don’t have any close friends and family members around who could help, it is worth considering getting a helping hand. You can find a domestic helper or confinement nanny after birth to ease your burden. If you get a domestic helper, at least you don’t have to worry about the condition of your household and the meals and laundries for everyone in the house are taken care of.
On the other hand, getting a confinement nanny can be extremely beneficial if you are a first-time parent and need hands-on demonstration with newborn care. A confinement nanny will also attend to your confinement needs better as that is their area of expertise. Everyone’s situation and household are different, so choose whichever you’d prefer to have in yours.
Set Time Aside to Relax and Be Pampered
You may be tempted to keep working while your partner helps out with the baby, but this is your chance to catch up on rest – especially if you’re getting only 30 minutes to a few hours of sleep at night. Rest can help you regain that precious energy needed to bond with your baby and also to give you a much-needed break from being a parent. So, before you get back to your newborn duties or work, just relax and take a rest. Whether it’s a quick nap or just simply meditating or getting a little fresh air, it all counts and can help you feel better. Remember, you can’t do your best as a new parent when you’re tired and anxious.
If you are looking for a better way to rest, you can get pampered in a spa-like massage in the comfort of your home! Still searching for “best pregnancy massage near me” on Google? Your answer is right here!
Home-Based Relaxing Massage
PNSG offers home-based massage services for adult women and mothers across many stages. Our Slimming & Relaxation massage, for instance, is suitable and can be effective even for long-time mothers who have given birth to their child a long time ago. Apart from helping you to release tension in your body and mind, our massage also promotes a good night’s sleep so you can get better rest every day even after the sessions.
Our certified therapists have all been professionally trained through jamu massage course and more to help address your concerns accurately. Leave it to the caring hands of our therapists to get your mind and body off the stress. You will also be taught how to perform a baby massage to calm and soothe your little one!
Taking care of a newborn can be draining you both physically and mentally. It is very important for you and your spouse to be able to rest from work and parenting so that you can go back to it feeling refreshed and happier. Happy parents make happy children, so give your little one the best version of yourself that they can get. All the best, moms and dads!